Oh shut the fuck up

Wow, it's been nearly ten minutes since Gwyneth Paltrow shit on the United States -- the same United States that turned her into a cajillionaire. I wonder what took her so long? From Us Weekly:
Gwyneth Paltrow says Spain has "became a second home."

"It is so different from the United States. It seemed to have a history, and the buildings are years and years and years old. Here in the United States an old building is about 17 (years old), and over there it's from 500 B.C., it's incredible," she tells the Associated Press.

"Also, the way people live over there. They seem to enjoy life a little bit more," she continued. "They aren't running around as much as in New York. They enjoy time with the family. They don't always have their Blackberries on."
WARNING -- The following is not hyperbole: I would literally crawl to Gwyneth's house, pack up her suitcases, purchase her one way ticket, and carry her to the airport on my back like some kind of pack mule if that is what it took to get her arrogant/self-absorbed/pretentious ass out of this country. To be fair though, Gwyneth is right about one thing -- the pace of life in other countries is often a bit slower than it is in the U.S. . . . which is why the U.S. is the world's only remaining superpower! USA! USA! USA!

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[Flynet]
  • Patch

    @ its2sad



    "Choose to live here" due to the fact that Americals right wing capitalist imperialism has forced people to move to your country. Artificial socio-economic policies driving producers from less wealthy countries into poverty (see how the artificial cotton prices that America forced put african farmers out of business).



    Its your social imperialism and ingrained ignorance that people hate. not the Americans in particular. You are not the only super power and I'm going to laugh my arse off at the collective shock that you and people like you have when you realise that China basically owns the Dollar and has the political, economic and military power to match you all the way when it does (inevitably) kick off.



    Also (and this is aimed at all of the shouty American idiots) can I point out that what Gwynneth said here wasn't even that bad? She merely implied that she prefers the atmosphere of a different locale. Would you be going so nuts if she said that she preferred living in San Francisco to NY?



    I can't believe I've even wasted 10 minutes of my time typing this to people who are simply incapable of coherent thought or making a decent argument.

  • Cantinflas

    Has Spain really mattered since its so-called "Invincible Armada" got its collective ass kicked?

  • its2sad

    WtF, We'll wait and let you search online for more witty dialogue. It's not to say that much of what you copied and pasted wasn't true, it's to post solely the negatives (and B.S.) and none of the many, many positives about this beloved country of mine and so many others; especially when it seems that "this hur countray be where ye probably rest yer head at night!" ( Say w/ the accent of the "HILL BILLYS" you referred to.)



    AMERICA - DISLIKED BY SOO MANY, WHO CHOOSE TO LIVE HERE! CHOOSE! CHOOSE! MUST BE A REASON! YUP, NUFF SAID! THE CHOICE IS YOURS! AND OF COURSE YOU HAVE THE FREEDOM TO BITCH AND TO BE A HYPOCRITE, BUT YOU SHOULD TRY NOT TO BE A HYPOCRITICAL BITCH! heehee-witty



    PEACE in the Middle East!!!!:)

  • WTF!

    Not even ONE of these is copy pasta.



    These are all 100% mine.



    I'll post more if/when I get the appropriate feedback...



    Salutations.



    WTF!

  • its2sad

    ha-really funny wtf- ha- o'yeah- more? .......please? ........ok

  • WTF!

    The most random FUN guide for the USA, its friends & enemies!



    USA. The most advanced 3rd world country.



    Home of the hillbilly and the redneck.



    Will nuke cities for humanitarian reasons.



    Capital: Gaysville.



    Population:

    130 million trannies.

    150 million men.

    about 25 million sexually frustrated women.



    Economy: White House on sale for $28.99 on eBay.



    GM: Got Molested.



    Constitution 1: Toilet paper.

    Constitution 2: Prostitution



    Education: Poop. Guns. Hip hop. Drugs. More poop. No place left for a child to hide behind.



    Prisons: So crowded they will soon have their own state.



    Mexicans: Thieves



    Texas: Mexico minus the thieves



    Mexico: A country of thieves that wants to steal Texas from the thieves that stole it from them the first time.



    US-Mexico wall 1: Because the American dream is not for everyone.

    US-Mexico wall 2: American dream. Off Limits.



    Latinos: Thieves



    Blacks: Thieves



    Italians: Guidos (and thieves)



    Chinese: Yellow Peril.



    Japanese: Internment.



    Arabs: Target practice.



    America: 90% thieves & 10% English = 100% thieves



    Europeans: A bunch of Communists that envy the USA.



    The world: A bunch of Communists that envy the USA.



    Mars: A planet of Communists that envy the USA.



    National Food: McDonalds and cock



    National Drink: Massengill and cock juice



    National Pet: The Jew



    National Passtime: Discussing who did 9/11.

    Candidates include:

    OsamaBinLaden

    US government

    The Jews

    I say it was a team effort.

    Bush & Osama declared best TROLLs ever.



    Intelligence: US has two certificates

    F.A.I.L (Fucking Abysmal Intelligence Level)

    S.M.A.R.T (Seriously Maligned Attitude of Redneck Trannies)



    Army: Will invade countries for $$$



    Abu Ghraib: Freedom.



    Haditha: US troops minus the MEDs.



    Israel: Only Gods chosen people should have nuclear weapons in the Middle East.

    Israel Math: 1 IDF soldier = 100 Palestinian kids.



    Pearl Harbour: A day that will live in infamy. Because the US prez said so.



    9/11: Never Forget. Changed the world. Because the US prez said so.



    Hiroshima & Nagasaki: Who gives a shit? Because the US prez said so.



    Holocaust: The reason Israel can kill and torture Palestinians and get away with it.



    Hitler: Saddam



    Saddam: Hitler



    Stalin: Stalin



    OsamaBinLaden 1: Dual wielding AK47 Islamist Desert Troll. Probably hiding in the playboy mansion.

    OsamaBinLaden 2: Doing it for the Islamolulz.



    CIA: Coup



    Coup: Democracy US style.



    Democracy US style: If you dont support the US war in Iraq then STFU! STFU! Traitor!



    Reagan: A true Christian that loved his enemies more than his friends.



    Nixon: Sex Lies and Surveilance tapes.



    Carter: Could have won in overtime but Reagan bought the ref.



    USA #1 Enemy: The USA.



    Afghanistan: First the US spawns the Taliban then they kill them. +1000EXP. Click Here to Level UP.



    Iraq 1: Because Iran learned its lesson.

    Iraq 2: A country in peril. With a shitload of oil. Much like a damsel in distress with big tits.



    Georgia: Disposable Ally.



    Russian Federation: Will gladly dispose of any US disposable allies.



    Perez Hilton: Typical hillbilly touched by capitalism. And cock.



    Saudi Arabia 1: Its OK for them to treat women like shit because they are our friends ($$$+OIL).

    Saudi Arabia 2: Hold my hand. Tighter. People are watching. Now bow. NOOOOO. The US prez bowed to a Saudi.



    Iraqis: A bunch of ragheads that believe they own their countrys oil. Delusional fools in need of a good spanking.



    CIA: Central Incompetence Agency



    NSA: Never Secure America



    Afghanistan: Taliban raped only women before the US went there. Now they also rape US soldiers. Obama plans on sending more troops...you figure it out.



    Colin Powell: Won best actor award for his UN presentation. Rumored to have auditioned for the role of Optimus Slime.



    Cheney: First man that walked on the Moon. Naked.



    Condomleezza Rice: Typical american beauty queen.



    Presidents:

    Bush (former) 1: You can be sure that when this man says "MISSION ACCOMPLISHED" the shit are really gonna hit the fan.

    Bush (former) 2: Commander in Grief

    Bush (former) 3: Willing to sacrifice everyones life to save everyones life.

    Bush (former) 4: Because Saddam tried to kill his daddy.

    Bush (former) 5: A true american war hero.

    Bush (former) 6: The embodiment of the american dream.

    Bush (former) 7: Bring 'em ON! He can take it!

    Obama (current): Talks the talk. Cant walk the walk. Nuff said.



    Foreign Relations: US Wants to control Iraq's oil. Wants to build a missile shield outside of Russia. Wants to turn former USSR countries to NATO allies. Expects to accomplish all the above without angering the Russians (see intelligence level).



    Gay rights: Apparently more important than education and health care.



    Gay wrongs: A lot of them.



    Character:

    99.9% of Americtards think they saved Europe from the Nazis in WWII. The rest think WWII is a Wii upgrade (see intelligence level).

  • Maven

    It's amazing to me what assholes most Americans become when forced to deal with the horrific knowledge that there are other places on Earth where other people enjoy living.

  • Peter Gozinyou

    Of course they're "enjoying living". They're just not enoying it as much as if they lived in the USA.

  • Jayded1

    American's are so funny and insane.



    Only super power left? Hahah moron. Just because one country has enough nukes to destroy the planet 300 times over and another country do it 50 times over makes them even in my book.

  • hldn1977

    I do love the US and I do get tired of people who make a lot of money here turning around and taking shots at the very place that made them rich. Still, what she said wasn't really that off based now was it nor was it that hurtful? We aren't even a ripple in the span of history as a country. I have a Spanish girlfriend and she has spent years in this country and has said the same thing, though she likes the US. It's just different cultures. This just sounds like someone hates her for her far more stupid comments and is using this as another launching pad. It's worth noting that a lot of these comments that everyone jumps all over are usually set up by someone asking them a specific question that leads to the response. Funny how people don't tend to ever put the questions there, just the tidbits, typical media.

  • A man named GOB

    We are morons frantically going nowhere fast to what end early graves or fuckup lives.

    We work our asses off to die. I agree slower lifestyle in Spain probably is better. Who gives a shit if I serve a plasti-burgwer at McDonalds 3 seconds faster so the asshole in the drive-thru gets to run into something down the road choking on the spit the angry fast food worker just coughed up on his sappy meal. Fuck him they make 7.50/hr and he's mad cause he had to wait 5 sec. shit rolls downhill but makes it back to the top when you need something from the blue collar worker. Where you gonna turn richie rich when you need somethin' haha!



    C'MON!!!

  • Anonymous

    Wow. You all are a bunch of dicks. If you ever bothered to leave your own localities, you'd be saying the same things about wherever you traveled to. It's good to know that ignorance is still alive and kicking.

  • robert

    The writer, and most of you commenting, are effing retarded. Pointing out differences without making judgments is being a traitor? Get a life, morans.

  • dcmann

    How can she make that type of assumption based on New York . I'm sure New York has old buildings and areas that life moves at a slower pace , maybe she's just looking at the wrong area of the U.S. I agree with Merle Haggard "if you don't love it, leave it"

  • Anonymous

    ...and before you go mad i merely meant ho all us in the UK realise that the UK is shit, not the lovely place that is America

  • Anonymous

    haaaaa love American's and how much they bum off their country ^_^ you should all realise how shit it is like we do in the UK

  • jim

    hey she was just pointing out the difference. let me point out some more. in spain [and the rest of the world]if you are born poor,you die poor. at least in the USA if you are born poor you got a shot at something better. that is why we have so many illegals, mostly spanish speaking,sneaking in. how many people try to sneak into spain?i've been to spain, nice country,charming people, great food.but most people, especially out in the countryside are very poor, and will die poor, no matter how hard they work, they die poor.and being poor in the USA is having 1 TV set, being poor in spain is not having enough to eat.big difference. paltrow is just another hollywood babe that is pampered wherever she goes, in 10 years no one will even know her, so who cares what she says?

  • Jim

    This is a very funny exchange. I'm sure that there are Spaniards, or (fill in the blank) who travel to other countries and upon returning to the comfort of their own geography and cutlture, say to themselves they are glad to be home and Spain (or where ever) is the greatest country in the world. We all have our own prisms. I don't think anything she said was that offensive. Maybe we can all learn from each other without veiwing everything as a contest. I too, am weary at hearing my countrymen proclaim their assumed superiority. Everything is not a contest, and the sooner we come to grips with that simple rule, the better we'll all get along. I'll say this: It seems we Americans can certainly shout louder than anyone else. If you think America is far and away the best, why would you go anywhere else?

  • Logan

    Spain sounds like Texas.

  • Not A Jerk

    You are an idiot. If you ever become confused as to WHY the US is despised by so many people in the world, look in the mirror.

  • Spanky

    wish i could live in Europe or some other 'socialist' country.



    life is better over there.

  • Kelly

    So she has an opinion and she has the right to it, its not like she is saying the states are a majority of hypocritical, self-involved & self-centred (that's the way it is spelled in Canada folks!)retarded so act so shocked and shaken that they aren't always number one. Its like comparing the city to the country and I bet New Yorkers would be just as bitchy if some said they preferred upstate. I doubt most of you grasp this metaphor. Bottom line people have opinions and it may shock you that everyone in the world isn't a drone who chants USA at every turn. She did well at comparing both countries with out insulting you people directly and what do you do? Act like she did, now just grow up already, your states birthday is in less than 2 days and it might be a change of pace for y'all :P to act your age now.

  • JD

    I wish the bitch would move already. She's a lousy actress with a bad attitude.

  • Kelly

    Aww muffin, not like anyone forces you to watch her movies, or you wifey does and your the pussy of the relationship :P

  • Paley

    I wish everyone would be done with her as an actress and not go see her work. Her acting leaves a bit to be desired anyway.

  • tom

    Dear Gwyneth,

    It is not necessary for you to keep reminding us how truly dumb you are--WE ALREADY KNOW!



    You continually bite the hand (the American public) that feeds you while seemingly not even knowing you are doing it.



    Doesn't your agent tell you to zip it up?!

    Or has he quit you? Why don't you hire a Spanish agent? I'm sure the fact that he would be enjoying life instead of getting you jobs would be okay with you.



    Dumb bitch!

  • tom

    Dear Gwyneth,

    It is not necessary for you to keep reminding us how truly dumb you are--WE ALREADY KNOW!



    You continually bite the hand (the American public) that feeds you while seemingly not even knowing you are doing it.



    Doesn't your agent tell you to zip it up?!

    Or has he quit you? Why don't you hire a Spanish agent? I'm sure the fact that he would be enjoying life instead of getting you jobs would be okay with you.



    Dumb bitch!

  • Paula

    You know if this idiot did her history or should I say paid attention to U.S. history in school she would have learned the Anasazi Tribes (four corners) were in the States pre-1000 B.C.! There is a very long time line if she bothered to look and it does go past 17 years. Oh, and their "buildings" are still standing. My husband who is a Brit and resides in the states was himself impressed and stopped the "you don't have historic buildings" crap after the tour.





  • Ryan

    Is this bitch aware there is more to the US than just LA and NYC? Does she think when she flies from on to the other its just empty land? What a taint swab.

  • Tom

    I HATE YOU ALL! RAWRZZZORRRRSSSSS LETS ALLL E-FIGHT!11!1!1



    Really tho. Those dissing the USA that live here. Way to support your country. Go somewhere else for awhile, youll see its not any better.

  • mike xenbaba

    Wow. Just because someone has a different opinion people are shouting for her to leave. Just like the right wingers who felt if you didn't agree with Bush's opinions you were automatically for the terrorists. Where did freedom of speech go? What's ironic is that some of the people posting here claim they are against communism, fascism, etc., yet they are espousing those very ideas when they tell all who don't believe like they do to get out. She was just expressing her opinion; she wasn't trying to take your "freedoms" away.

  • Allan

    I have been a citizen of this great country for all of my 50 years and from what I have seen, heard, read and just know intrinsicaly that the USA is #1 and should be #1 for all its citizens. If anyone thinks its better living elsewhere then go there and do not come back!

  • Loyd

    You know, I consider myself a patriotic American. I've paid my dues wearing the green uniform and other things. I've lived several places outside the U.S. I love them all. Some more than others; none more than SOME places I know in the U.S. What Gwyn said is right on. she was talking about history and culture, NOT politics. And I agree with her. If you want to disagree with me, you'd better be prepared to produce a DD-214 at least!

  • Vince Viagra

    Gawd, it's depressing to read these posts. Some very ugly comments. People give the girl a break. Remember free speech?



    FYI, the rest of the world is not dirt roads. Stop with the chest thumping already -- it is really not attractive.

  • V-4-Vendetta

    She is American royalty and hates us common-folk. Somebody send her back to England. (She has to be british with that bullshit fake accent!!! Or is that the Neauvou Riche accent that Madge aka madonna aka old whore, sports?)

  • shenanighans

    Its real simple, no one is forcing anyone to live in the US. You dont like it you have the freedom to GET THE FUCK OUT.



    Besides the fact that NY is a melting pot for the whole world, people in NY run around a lot bc we have things to do. We arent all rich talentless tool boxes who name our kids stupid names.

  • FESTIE

    that was supposed to read world police not world peace.

  • festie

    sure we have our problems like corrupt officials but show me a country that doesnt. you cant. having said that we arent the only country at fault in the current economic crisis.ALOT of other countries and their citizens were just as greedy but were more willing to point their finger at the U.S. because thats what all u freeloading hypocrites do. oh let the U.S. play world peace so we can be safe from payback. and speaking of payback what happens when the rest of the world no longer has the U.S. giving out loans that will never be paid back. u people will rot and starve and your infrastructures will collapse almost overnight. like it or not douchebags, if the U.S. DIES SO DOES THE WORLD AS U KNOW IT.AND NOT FOR THE BETTER. GO AHEAD LET COMMUNISM AND/OR THE NEXT HITLER/STALIN/HUSSEIN/BIN LADEN/POL POT RUN FREE AND SEE HOW QUICKLY U WISH THE U.S. WAS STILL AROUND TO TAKE THE HEAT OFF YOUR SORRY ASSES.

  • jentsen

    omigod, you're hilarious. Your a perfect example of the arrogant ignorance that makes the rest of the world hate Americans. Well done. Way to score on your own goal.

  • mike xenbaba

    HAHAHA. U.S. loans - give me a break. China OWNS half of the U.S. If China stops financing all of our national debt, just see how long the U.S. lasts.


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