July 2009 NUDE!


Mischa Barton at JFK airport in New York (7/28)

E! Online's Ted Casablanca is claiming that Mischa was forcibly committed into a mental hospital two weeks ago because she tried to kill herself -- and not in the "if I eat one more piece of cake, I'll just die" kind of way:
Mischa Barton's recent hospital stay was due to "suicidal" actions, claims a source very close to the star's drama. Also, the insider asserts, the attempt may have coincided with Mischa's bosses at the CW's The Beautiful Life deciding they no longer desired her services.

"She tried to kill herself," claims the source close to Barton, who also asserts that Mischa had also been let go—and later rehired—from the soap.

"She was being crazy that day [when she went to Cedars Sinai Medical Center]," says another knowledgeable source, who had direct dealings with Ms. B right before she entered Cedars in Los Angeles, reportedly involuntarily under a psychiatric hold, for "medical reasons."
According to Casablanca, a few of Mischa's friends are claiming that she was committed because she was downtrodden from a tooth ailment. In other news, Mischa Barton's friends are fucking idiots. A tooth ailment? Really? That's the best they could come up with? Why not just say she was downtrodden because someone broke into her house and stole her "Best Actress" Oscar? It would have been just as believable.

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Jordana Brewster leaving a hair salon in Beverly Hills (7/29)

+ Bai Ling in her finest whore outfit [Drunken Stepfather]

+ Solace is your cute college girl of the week [College Humor]
+ Mark Wahlberg is getting married this weekend [Just Jared]
+ Rachael Taylor upskirt pic [TaxiDriverMovie]
+ Everything you wanted to know about Clooney's hot new girlfriend [The Blemish]

+ Kat Von D is a skank [Holy Taco]
+ Criss Angel stunt goes horribly wrong [A Socialite's Life]
+ Amy Winehouse used to not be a crackhead [Attuworld]
+ Shia LaBeouf as Jesus [F-Listed]
+ Brad Pitt with a dildo [Cele|bitchy]

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Katherine Heigl on the Late Show with David Letterman (7/20)

Last week on Letterman, Katherine Heigl hopped aboard the ol' wambulance and revealed that Grey's Anatomy producers *forced* her to work 17 hours during the cast's first day back on set ("Our first day back was Wednesday and it was -- I'm going to keep saying this because I hope it embarrasses them -- a 17-hour day which I think is cruel and mean."). Since her job consists of reading lines off a sheet of paper for millions of dollars a year and not sewing tiny buttons onto shirts for 11 cents an hour, no one gave a fuck about her whining. Fast forward to today where it was revealed that oh, hey, Katherine is a dumb bitch. From TV writer Ken Levine's blog:
Poor Katherine Heigl. What she neglected to add was this: This “cruel” shooting schedule was only to accommodate HER and her needs. The producers graciously shuffled things around so she could go off and do promotion for her new film. Also, with union rules, the producers had to pay a ton of overtime and penalties to make this happen. The thanks they get is Katherine Heigl going on national television hoping to embarrass them.
I'm sorry but I am firmly on Katherine's side on this one. A 17-hour workday leaves her only 7 hours to steal candy from little children. How is she supposed to eat?

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Kelly Clarkson performing on Good Morning America (7/31)

I hate to break this to you Kelly, but he's actually not a sausage.

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Katie Lee Joel

Katie Lee Joel at the premiere of Julie & Julia held at the Mann Village Theatre in Westwood (7/27)

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Orlando Bloom and Miranda Kerr in Sydney (2/26)

Orlando Bloom is passing up a $15 million+ payday for the next Pirates of the Caribbean movie because he wants to spend more time with his girlfriend, Victoria's Secret model Miranda Kerr. From UK tabloid News of the World:
Pirates of the Caribbean star Orlando Bloom is giving up his movie treasure quest - because he has all the booty he needs at home. The star is turning down a part in the fourth Pirates flick to spend more time with Victoria's Secret model Miranda Kerr.

I'm told: "Orlando loved the films but thinks it's time to bow out because they tied up nicely for his character Will Turner. The producers are OK with that because they want to concentrate on the new adventures of Johnny Depp's Captain Jack Sparrow."
What the hell is Orlando thinking? Dude, I don't care if Miranda's vagina is made of cinnamon and rose petals, $15 million is $15 million. With that kind of money he could travel to some Eastern Bloc country and buy as many eager-to-please girls as he wanted. The real reason why he's sticking with her must be that she's either spectacular in bed or just has that certain "je ne sais quoi" quality Orlando's looking for in a woman -- a large penis.

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Kate Hudson bikini candids!

Kate Hudson in Malibu (July 2006)

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Diane Keaton on the set of Morning Glory (7/26)

You know, I don't care what Diane Keaton says or what kind of rude gestures she does when she sees them (like above), but I really have no problem with Mexicans. In fact, I find her actions downright offensive. She needs to lighten up.

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Jennifer Aniston on the set of The Bounty in New York (7/30)

Jennifer calls this "fishing." Rub ice on your nipples and hope you can trick some poor schlub into marrying you. You should she what she does when goes "deep sea fishing."

HINT: It includes lots of ankle grabbing . . . and no pants.

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Penelope Cruz

Penelope Cruz at the premiere of Broken Embraces in London (7/30)

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Would You Rather?

Would You Rather...? Spend one night with: