Natalie Portman hooked up with Sean Penn

Natalie Portman and Sean Penn at the Cannes Film Festival in 2008

Natalie Portman, 27, and Sean Penn, 48, were caught making out last week at the Sunset Tower Hotel's Tower Bar in West Hollywood. Wait, that can't be right. Sean's been married since 1996. Maybe Star can help clear up the confusion:

"They went to a bank of elevators that only goes to the spa or to private rooms," an eyewitness tells Star. "They came back about 45 minutes later, and that's when I saw them making out. There's a door outside of the hotel's Tower Bar that has a bridge to the terrace, so it's semi-private. I used that path to get to the restroom, and when I came back, I had to go through some curtains — and that's when I interrupted Sean and Natalie! When they saw me, they were startled and quickly composed themselves." (Source)

Rather than harp on how ugly and disgusting and dumb and gross and wrinkly and smelly Sean Penn is, I'd prefer to look at the bright side of this story. Before they were caught making out, Sean and Natalie were gone 45 minutes doing god knows what with each other. Well that's 45 minutes that Sean spent not talking about Karl Marx. I'd call that progress.

[WENN]

PAZUZU

She's one smart cutie, she could talk dirty to you in 10 languages.

Hugo Chavez

You dick! I thought your tongue was only meant for my bunghole!

Meazy

Penn always pulls tail. Always. He boinked Naomi Watts too back during 21 Grams. Wedding ring be damned, he gets more bumper than a body shop. And Robin ain't no saint either, she boinks that guy from No Country and the Goonies.

lew

She is to cute to be with that commie scumbag!

8 inches

Another way to get Sean Penn to stop talking about Karl Marx: put his boyfriend's dick back in his mouth.

Gianna

Hahaha..

cowbulls

Sean should be in jail for treason and servicing Bubba, not nailing a hottie like Natalie.