"Awww, Tom, you shouldn't have."

David Beckham beat up a dude? The guy with the frosted tips? That David Beckham? Really? From TMZ:
David Beckham has been sued by a paparazzo who claims the soccer star and his bodyguard beat him up.

We just found the lawsuit, filed last month in L.A. County Superior Court, in which Emicles Da Mata claims on December 7, 2008, he had stopped his car on a Beverly Hills street when Beckham reached through the driver's window and grabbed his camera and attempted to wrestle it from him. Da Mata was holding the camera at the time.

The lawsuit claims Beckham's bodyguard -- also a defendant -- then beat him repeatedly, grabbed the camera and threw it in a trash can. Da Mata says he was injured and is suing for assault and battery, as well as emotional distress. He's seeking unspecified damages. (Source)
This story has to be fake. David just doesn't seem like the type of guy that would get into a fight. Really the only type of physical contact I could see him getting into with another man would involve wrestling . . . in speedos . . . lathered in several gallons of canola oil . . . glistening under the hot sun in my backyard's inflatable po -- errrrrrr, I mean, did you see Salma Hayek's tits at the Golden Globes? What a treat for us definitely straight men.

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[BauerGriffinOnline]
  • UgliestGuy

    Well, so long as you don't use words like 'tickled' or 'jingling'...


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