Celebslam: They're Better Than Us: September 2007 Archives

Quickies Redux

Jessica Alba getting her nails done in Brentwood on Thursday (pics via Pacific Coast News)

+ Kimberly Stewart actually looks decent [Drunken Stepfather]

+ Did Hilary Duff Get Breast Implants? Or Just a Really Good Bra? [Egotastic!]

The Big Hit: This sport is wheely dangerous.

+ Angelina takes her daughter toy shopping [Just Jared]

+ Some famous chick named Lola Ponce in a bikini [Attuworld]

+ Joey Fatone reaches out to Britney. He just wants to bang her [Cele|bitchy]

Local McDonalds Ad: What would happen if McDonalds didn't have enough money to pay for clown make-up?

+ Daisy Fuentes is still hot btw [Horny Oyster]

+ I would so do this chick [The Blemish]

I'm not exactly sure what look Rumer Willis is trying to pull off here. Looks to be a mix between "Ewwww, boys are gross" and "Yes, that's a rainbow flag sticker on my bumper." She might as well go all the way and get WNBA season tickets--just like regular basketball minus the excitement!

Diddy is very important

Getty

Earlier this week some hostess at GoldBar in New York had the nerve to ask rap mogul Sean Combs (aka Diddy aka the guy that claims to have had sex for 30 straight hours) how many people were in his party. I know, I know, the nerve of that bitch. Don't worry, ho got what was coming to her. From the New York Post:

A witness outside downtown hot spot GoldBar the other night said, "He walked right up to the door girl with four other people in his crew. When she asked him how many people he was with, Diddy just called her a 'Fucking bitch' and opened the velvet rope and let himself through." Reps for GoldBar and Combs declined to comment. (Source)

I'm actually glad this happened. For the past decade I haven't known what to call this guy. Puff Daddy? P Diddy? Diddy? I've pretty much stopped talking about him altogether because I don't want to seem too white and call him the wrong name. But now I can just call him Asshole. Or is it A Hole? Or maybe just Hole. Dammit! First math and now this, why does life have to be so damn tough!

A picture is worth a thousand words

Splash News

el B with new husband/con man Stephen Belafonte on the left. Mel B with Dancing with the Stars partner Maksim Chmerkovskiy on the right.

Lunch with Heidi Klum

Getty

Heidi Klum presenting the new Volkswagen Tiguan in Berlin on Thursday

CLICK HERE for more pics of Heidi Klum in Berlin yesterday...

Heidi Montag wore a bikini . . . again

Pacific Coast News

Does this chick do anything other than wear a bikini seven days a week? OK, you have large breast implants, we get it. You don't have to beat us over the head with them . . . actually I take that back. Besides me, you don't have to beat us over the head with them.

CLICK HERE for more pictures of Heidi Montag in Los Angeles on Thursday...

Now we can all smell like Britney!

JJB

I don't know why this is my second straight post about perfume but I'm running with it. Britney Spears new scent "believe" comes out in October. This is important to all of us because, ummmm, I'm not exactly sure, but it's fun to make fun of her! I think the "believe" part is short "I can't fucking believe anyone would buy this crap." Honestly I'd rather my girlfriend wore pepper spray. Or hobo urine, you can never go wrong with hobo urine. Free, too!

NOTE: Who is that piece of ass in the ads? It's definitely not this chick.

The Apocalypse is upon us

Britney Spears new single "Gimme More" hit number one on iTunes yesterday. No, seriously, Britney Spears new single "Gimme More" hit number one on iTunes yesterday. And she has the number one ringtone, too. What does this bitch have to do to destroy her career?!? Because according to what's happening on iTunes, Britney could pull a Charles Manson and tattoo a swastika on her forehead and her fans would heap praise on her for "being different" and "not caring about what society thinks." If you'll excuse me, I have to go drink a gallon a Drano.