artha Stewart received quite the scare earlier this week while she was on her way to a taping of The View. After leaving her Bedford, NY, estate to go to New York City, Martha's chauffeur-driven car was immediately followed by police. After she arrived at the View studios, police surrounded the car and promptly arrested her driver. According to a source, following the incident a "furious" Stewart went into her dressing room and yelled at her assistant over the phone:
"How could you do this to me? Don't you do background checks on people? He was Egyptian! What do I pay you people for?" (Source)
OH MY GOD! An Egyptian! ... From Egypt! Do you know how many scary dark-skinned people live there? A LOT. I have it on good authority that they don't even speak English in that backward's nation. And electricity? Ha ha ha, don't be foolish.
Martha has slandered her chauffeur because of his comments about the odor eminating from her vagina. She requested oral sex and was refused by the driver due to dingleberries growing from her ass hair. She strongly suggested that her driver proceed with the oral sex or she would be forced to notify the proper authorities. The driver still refused to preform this gastly act and suffered the penalties.