Paris Hilton celebrated her 26th birthday in Las Vegas over the weekend but pretty much no one famous attended besides her sister Nicky and friend Nicole Richie (probably because they don't want to be associated with a racist ). The more popular birthday party was entertainment executive Jason Weinberg's in New York City. Clive Davis, Kanye West, Marissa Tomei, Amy Sacco and Naomi Watts were just a few of the stars that helped Weinberg ring in his 40th. Meanwhile, back in Vegas, Paris Hilton still managed to be Paris Hilton. According to a source:

But even without many boldfaces, things at the after-party at the Penthouse Suite got a little odd. After downing TY KU liquor and bottles of Dom Perignon, guests reported seeing Hilton play with a monkey while a band of midgets led a pack of goats around the room. (Source)

You know how you'll sometimes read a story on my site and be like "Holy shit! John Travolta was gang-raped by an angry mob of Japanese schoolgirls?" but it's not true because I made up the line and threw it in just to be funny. Well, I didn't do that here. Yes, the line about the midgets and goats was actually printed in the New York Post. Besides, even my warped mind couldn't make up something as fantastic as that. I guess I'll ask the obvious here: How the HELL did Paris Hilton end up with a band--not a group, a band--of midgets leading a pack of goats around her hotel room. Is there someone you can call to set that up? Maybe the concierge? "Oh hi Paris, OK, let me get a pen ... I'm writing this down ... band of midgets ... OK ... pack of goats .. OK ... how does 11 p.m. sound?" God I love Vegas.