You may have remembered the story from last February about Paris Hilton's Los Angeles storage unit. Basically Paris was a dumb shit and didn't pay her $200 storage bill. In September the owners of the unit auctioned off Paris' stuff to recoup the storage costs. Photos, videos, letters, recorded phone conversations, and phone numbers, were just a few of the items sold to entrepreneur Bardia Persa. Persa didn't acquire Paris' items for his private collection, oh no, he put everything on a website, Paris Exposed, that launched yesterday:

Users must pay a monthly fee of $39.97 to gain access to the site, which promises footage of the 25-year-old heiress in a "sexy bubble bath" video. It also says it has various shots of Hilton in "racy situations," and footage of her drinking with friends and using illegal substances.

Why would I pay $40 to see Paris Hilton take a bubble bath? That's like charging me $40 to see my next-door neighbor naked. These binoculars are doing a perfectly good enough job for free thank you very much. And if my next door neighbor is reading this, can you hold off changing out of your work clothes until around 6:30 tonight? I have a late meeting at work. And wear that little red number I like--you know the one.