Wrong way Richie is facing mandatory jail time for the DUI she got earlier this week. According to gossip-titan TMZ (now with 401k plan!), Nicole was busted for DUI four years ago. California law states that anyone convicted or a second DUI must spend five-consecutive days in jail:

TMZ has found court documents which reveal that Richie pled no contest four years ago to driving under the influence. Under California law, if Richie is convicted of DUI as a result of Monday's arrest, the judge must impose a jail sentence. The law requires a mandatory sentence of five consecutive days in county jail as well as a one year license suspension for anyone twice-convicted of DUI. In addition, Richie would be ordered to attend an alcohol education program for a year-and-a-half, even if the second conviction is not alcohol-related.

God I hope Nicole doesn't get out of this DUI on some technicality. Luckily I don't think that's possible since BITCH MADE A U-TURN ON THE FUCKING FREEWAY! I also hope she gets put with other inmates in the general population. Imagine how much shit she'd get after asking where they keep the mineral water. It would good times indeed. And I guarantee you Paris Hilton would do something stupid like show up to jail with a special cake baked for Nicole. And then in the cake there would be a file because, according to the cartoon marathon Paris was watching, that's how people get out of jail.