Russell Crowe pretty much ruined his two-year-old son's first Halloween. Crowe, away from home working on his new movie '3:10 to Yuma,' pre-arranged the treats his son would be receiving. Actually "treats" is probably a wrong choice of words:

"We trick or treated seven different doors but... the treats were pre-arranged. Charlie got magic radishes, he got carrot sticks, he got rice crackers. These are all the things that he loves and he was able to take all these treats home and eat them. With theaddition of a little bit of chicken they made up a really nice dinner."

SEVEN different doors! Rice crackers! Radishes! When will the fun stop?!?! If only Russell had gone to the eighth door, perhaps his son would have received something awesome like homework or a kick to the shins.

But it wasn't all healthy - little Charlie did get to sample a little chocolate. The actor adds, "The very last [treat] he got was one section of Toblerone. You've never seen the definition of paroxysm of joy and delight as clearly defined as it was in that moment that he was eating that Toblerone."

Have you ever read a more pretentious sentence than that last one? Wow Russell. Your son loves chocolate. Shocking.