Nicole Richie is officially AWOL from rehab. The star of "The Simple Life" recently checked herself into the Beau Monde, an $80,000-a-month treatment center in Newport Beach. Although it's pretty damn obvious Nicole has an eating disorder, her reps insist she's in rehab "merely to determine why she's unable to put on weight."-- as if the stomach acid lining the toilet bowl in her master bathroom wasn't a big enough clue. According to Star Magazine, less than three days into her stay, Richie abruptly left the clinic to go shopping:

The staffers at Beau Monde begged her to stay, reports the tab, which quotes a source as saying, "Nicole is in complete denial and oblivious to how sick she really is." Not long after she checked out of the center, Richie was spotted partying with Lindsay Lohan according to both the Star and another report in In Touch Weekly.

Give Nicole a break. Who wants to attend a boring workshop on chewing and swallowing when you could be shopping? Those fucking staffers need to quit being little bitches and get off Nicole's back about buying that kick-ass Louis Vuitton bag she's been eyeing. Thing's not gonna be on sale forever dipshits. Sorry, I got a little carried away there. I just hate overbearing staffers at $80,000/month rehab clinics.