Madonna will appear on the Oprah Winfrey Show this week to discuss the controversy surrounding the adoption of David Banda, a 13-month-old boy from Malawi. The show will tape Tuesday and air Wednesday, a spokesperson for Harpo Productions tells the Associated Press. On Sunday, yet another bombshell dropped as the child's father, Yohane Banda, 32, told the AP he didn't realize Madonna had intended to take the toddler "for good":

"Our understanding was that they would educate and take care of our son just as they were doing at the orphanage," Banda said. "I am just realizing now the meaning of adoption." David's mother died a week after he was born, and Banda gave him to the orphanage because he was unable to care for him.

In response to the growing controversy about the adoption, Madonna said in a statement to PEOPLE: "I expect to be given a hard time about many of the things I do. I know they are provocative and I prepare myself, but I did not expect the media, the government or any human rights organizations to take a stand against me trying to save a child's life."

Here in cosmopolitan America (a nation on the rise!), we have a name for orphans that have fathers: uhh...not-orphans...or something like that. I know, I know, we need to work on the name for those parentless orphans that have parents. I've been petitioning for 'hybrid dragonchildren' for quite some time now but no ones seems to take me seriously. You're telling me you wouldn't read a story about Madonna taking her hybrid dragonchild to the ice cream shop for a swirly cone? Of course you would.

Logic: 1

You: ZERO