By now most of you have heard that Paris Hilton was busted for DUI yesterday morning. This calls for an open letter:
Dear Paris,
This DUI is a perfect microcosm of why so many people hate your stupid ass. You have your dipshit "spokesman" says shit like "police detected the minimum blood-alchohol level to warrant an arrest," and "She didn't appear in the least bit to be intoxicated," and finally the DUI was "probably the result of an empty stomach and working all day and being fatigued." You got a DUI because you pounded some margaritas and then tried to drive your obscenely expensive car to In-N-Out for a burger. So now instead of being a dumb slut with herpes who's most famous for sucking some guy off on the Internet, you're now a dumb slut with herpes who's most famous for sucking some guy off on the Internet who also has a DUI. Take some responsibility for your actions. Whore.
On the brightside, Paris potentially having to spend 48 hours in jail means at least 3-4 fewer cases of herpes in the greater Los Angeles area.
Sincerely,
Nick of Celebslam.com
She did not spend "48 hours in jail". She was released almost immediately.
Also, obscenely was spelled incorrectly.
Credited on "obscenely"
Per the article: "Hilton also would be ordered to enter an alcohol education program and, if she refused, could be ordered to spend at least 48 hours in jail..."
She ain't gonna get SHIT for the DUI. She'll just suck off the judge, and go on her airheaded little way until she finally ends up killing someone while drunk driving, which she will ALSO get away with, since the rich don't have to live by the same rules as the rest of us, apparently. I hope she wraps that obscenely expensive car around a tree and is disfigured for life...wouldn't that be SO AWESOME? It would be true justice indeed! God I hate that spoiled, disease-ridden twat, I really, REALLY wish she'd just die already and stop wasting space.