Julie Henderson in Miami (12/8)
The most amazing thing about these pics of S.I. model Julie Henderson isn't how ridiculously-nice her body is. It's looking at these pics and knowing that Russell Simmons used to hump her. Like, regularly. Incredible. Russell Simmons humping Julie Henderson is the single greatest piece of evidence that God is real. And I don't care how much money Russell's worth, there is no way he's climbing on top of a piece of ass like that without an answered prayer or two.
*25 Julie Henderson bikini pictures total in the gallery:
Adriana Lima in the December issue of Numero Tokyo
+ Cara Delevingne in lingerie [Drunken Stepfather]
+ This is a joke, right? [Celebrity Toob]
+ Lindsay Lohan is doing cocaine again, you say? [IDLYITW]
+ Abbey Clancy showing her nipples (NSFW) [TaxiDriverMovie]
+ Kelly Brook has breasts [The Superficial]
+ Kendall Jenner might already be getting cheated on [Guyism]
+ Big fan of underboob [Linkiest]
+ Irina Shayk is just plain gorgeous [moejackson]
+ Let's all shed a tear for Justin Bieber [Cele|bitchy]
BIKINI PICS OF THE DAY: Model Nerea Arce looking sexy in a bikini
*20 pictures total in the gallery:
Cher leaving BBC Radio One Studios in London (10/15)
Cher is not a fan of Kim Kardashian's ass. She tells Sunday People that if she had an ass like Kim's, she'd look like an alien. In other words, Kim Kardashian looks like an alien. Chick fight! Chick fight!:
"There is a line in the song where I sing 'I wish I woke up with a butt and a rack'. I really do. But I will not be going under the knife. I've got a padded bra, it's a lot cheaper. And I don't want a Kim Kardashian butt because I'm so small I'd just look like an alien."I can see how old lady Cher thinks that fatso Kim has an alien ass, but she's a bit off on what she's seeing. Kim's ass isn't actually extra terrestrial -- it's so disgustingly misshapen that most people who see it up close just assume it came from another planet. At this point, Kim's body looks like a giant butt plug (have a looksee in your mom's nightstand and you'll see what a giant butt plug looks like -- just remember to wash your hands when you're done). Cher's right, though. Female celebrities without curves are about as useful as piss-flavored chewing gum, and there's very little demand for that outside of the Kardashian household or R. Kelly's dating pool.
*15 Cher pictures total in the gallery:
Kris Jenner's ridiculously-big Christmas tree
Oh no wait, that's the Christmas tree in Kris Jenner's foyer. She wanted a bigger one, but they're protected by the National Park Service.
Jada Pinkett Smith shopping in Beverly Hills (12/10)
I'm not gonna say that those Will Smith cheating rumors are true, but Jada Pinkett Smith now has a mohawk and is wearing spiked leather clothing and mesh shirts. Her and her new girlfriend Chuck both agree that men are pigs.
*21 Jada Pinkett Smith pictures total in the gallery:
Mila Kunis shopping in Tampa Bay, Florida (12/7)
Mila Kunis was spotted shopping in Tampa Bay over the weekend, and that definitely looks like a ring -- albeit a small one -- on her finger. Probably smart to marry Ashton ASAP if you're Mila. He only got caught cheating on his last wife once. Chivalrous guys like that just don't exist anymore.
*30 Mila Kunis pictures total in the gallery:
Evangeline Lilly at the Wallis Annenberg Center For The Performing Arts Inaugural Gala in Beverly Hills (10/17)
Evangeline Lilly is pissed at the editors of Women's Health after they had the nerve to put her on the cover of the new issue and proclaim that she has the "Best. Butt. Ever." What total bitches! Haven't they ever heard of Jessica Alba? She told Conan O'Brien:
"Do you think I'd have done the shoot if they had said, 'Oh, by the way, we're gonna say Best Butt Ever and put a big arrow to your behind?' No. Every woman's after a sort of classy image... I didn't want T & A on my cover. It's a women's magazine, it's not Maxim."I don't think "Best. Butt. Ever." is much to complain about. For example "Biggest. Fucking. Cunt." is much worse. Or "This. Bitch. Smells. Like. Week-Old. Tuna." Or even "This. Chick. Loves. When. Random. People. Grope. Her. On. The. Street." Looking back, Evangeline really dodged a bullet.
*21 Evangeline Lilly pictures total in the gallery:
Reese Witherspoon shopping in Paris, France (12/9)
Reese Witherspoon's chin has always been big, but that is just ridiculous. Not even those freaky East German Olympic athlete chicks had chins like that, and they eventually grew cocks. That is some Fukushima-exposure-type growth going on right there.
*25 Reese Witherspoon pictures total in the gallery: